My chair

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Originally uploaded by pygmygoat.

This is the last picture of me before I got sick. My friend Jennifer brought me this chair.

My weekend

I'm happy to report that Mommy and Daddy are feeling better and better.

Yesterday morning I woke them up at 5 am so they could feed me. Then at 7 am I woke them up again because I needed some petting. They let me up the bed so I took a nap there instead. It was nice.

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Originally uploaded by pygmygoat.

Then we went on a LONG walk all around Hampshire College.

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Originally uploaded by pygmygoat.

Today we went on an even LONGER walk around downtown Amherst. We even visited some parts of my territory I didn't even know existed! I chased off a couple of little dogs. Then we went to see my friends at the Dakin Animal Shelter. I barked at a cat but he didn't run away, so I got madder and madder, and I barked louder and louder, and he still wouldn't run away! I don't know why Daddy didn't let me get him. We went to lunch at Bub's Bar-B-Q, which is one of my favorite places, except Mommy and Daddy wouldn't get me anything.

My week

On Monday Daddy went away, so he must have been feeling better. Maybe he'll make more money so I can get more food.

Unfortunately, Mommy tried to give me cottage cheese to eat, so I threw it up. I was so upset at her for giving me cottage cheese that I threw up again the next morning. Then she started giving me just chicken and eggs. That's nice, but every two hours they wake me up to give me more food. That must be why I'm tired all the time - they never let me sleep in peace!

Daddy came home on Wednesday night. He was supposed to go away again on Thursday night, so I called his airline and told them to cancel his flight. (Don't tell him that.) So he stayed home instead. It's nice having Mommy and Daddy with me all the time.

Here we are going for a trip. I was too sleepy to get out of bed, so Mommy picked me up.



And here I am guarding the top of the stairs.

Squirrels

I'm feeling a little better today. That must be because Mommy and Daddy have started giving me food every two hours - even during the night - although they still don't give me very much. Now I'm getting chicken AND EGG WHITES! Two of my favorite foods. Maybe I'll get cantaloupe soon ...

This morning I took Mommy and Daddy to Mt. Holyoke College. I saw a squirrel, but it ran away before I could even go after it. They are afraid of me. Then we walked next to the pond and listened to the ducks. Daddy used to make me duck for treats. Those were the days.



Later today I got a bath. Don't tell anyone, but I really like baths. Especially the part at the end, when Mommy blow-dries me.

The best part of the day was when we went back to the park in the evening. This time I saw a squirrel all the way down the hill and I TOOK OFF after it. I couldn't run as fast as I used to, or I'm sure I would have caught it. Anyway, it ran up a tree, but I was very pleased with myself. Mommy and Daddy wanted to go back to the car but I insisted on walking on my trail in the woods. Of course, I got my way. I haven't been on that trail in weeks!



I'm not sure what happened the rest of the day. Maybe I was asleep. I only wish my belly were a little less empty.

My park!

Today was another good day. This morning I took Mommy and Daddy downtown in my car. We walked along the common and I scared off all the people going to the farmers' market. Then I got a little tired so I sat in the grass with Mommy.



They tried giving me potato again today, but I threw it up twice. So they started giving me chicken again. Yum!!! In the afternoon I went out with Mommy and we sat in the shade together. I let her pet me for an hour before I told her to stop. I mean, enough is enough. Then I went inside and took a nice nap.



The evening was the best. I took Mommy and Daddy to my park! I used to go there every day, but I haven't been in weeks, so there was lots of work to do. I peed on all my rocks and trees, and I even trotted a little bit, I was so excited. I got a little tired, but I still walked back up the hill to the parking lot. It was just like old times before we all got tired.

Then tonight Mommy gave me a bit of egg! It wasn't fried like she used to make for me, but it was still great. My tummy is still pretty empty, but at least I'm getting good food now.

Daddy's blog

Daddy said that he wrote some stuff about why he is kind of sad. You can go read it here.

A nice day

Hi, this is Dauber again. Today was a good day. First I got some potato. I think Daddy ate all my chicken, because they don't give me chicken any more, but I don't complain. This morning Mommy and Daddy took me to Hampshire College, which is part of my territory. I walked around and marked my territory so little dogs don't come and try to take it over. Then I guarded Daddy while he worked, and he fed me more potato. He didn't give me very much. I wonder if money is getting tight. Maybe that's why there's no more chicken. Or salmon. Or cantaloupe - my favorite!

Later in the afternoon Mommy came home. We went back to Hampshire College and I patrolled a different part of my territory. It was a little windy so I spent some time sniffing the breeze to see who else was around. In the evening Mommy gave me some potato. I curled up with her to protect her.

I don't know why I can't run as fast as I used to, but it was nice to go outside and walk in the grass and sniff the air. It was a nice day.

health update

This is Sylvia writing for Dauber. Here's the brief update on his health. On Wednesday, June 1, Dauber had his repeat ultrasound at Angell Memorial Animal Hospital in Springfield. The inflammation, which had been very severe, had gone down; however, with the inflammation reduced it was clear that there is in fact a large mass in his pancreas. They took a needle biopsy. Most likely it is a fast growing cancer, because there was no mass on previous ultrasound taken in May and February to monitor his bladder stones. The interpretation is that he has a cancer of the pancreas and the pancreatitis was a secondary problem. Pancreatic cancer is deadly and there are no treatment options. Instead the goal is to recover from the current inflammation, prevent future inflammation and keep him free of pain until the end.

We have not told Dauber. Instead we are trying to spend lots of time with him and give him small amounts of water and food. He keeps water down, but continues to vomit the food. Today we tried a 1/2 teaspoon of boiled potato, which he has kept down for 2 hours so far. Baked potatoes are the only thing my mother, Faydine, could eat and keep down for a long time after her pancreatitis. I think that his Grandmother has had pancreas problems is another piece of evidence that Dauber was always meant to be a part of our family.

James and I are having our ups and downs. We know that technically we are doing all the right clinical things. Dauber was our first baby and he's been such a major part of our lives that we just wish there was something concrete we could do that was the definitive "best path." I think feeling helpless is the worst --- not knowing if today is going to be good/bad, or what really to try to give him to eat.

Dauber does still seem pretty happy and he still has his spirit, but he is clearly weakened. This morning I gave him a nice warm bath which he always likes. He was very cute in the tub and scampering around afterwards. I blew dry his hair (he loves that) then he rolled around on the rug to scratch his nose. That he did all his "normal" behaviors, although less energetically was good to see. I think he's not in pain and still enjoys life. Next we sat outside for a full hour today and I petted him constantly. My arm muscles are sore! Now we are sitting in the dining room while a write this and he is napping just like he always does on days when I work at home. This evening James and I comes will take him to one of the places he loves to explore and mark as his territory (either Hampshire college or the bike trail). He seems to like these short pack outings because he perk up, marks a lot and sniffs the air. He even trots a little but you can tell he tires fast.

Thanks to everyone who sends their thoughts. It really means a lot to all of us. We will keep you updated as best as possible.

Love,
Sylvia